apparently the secret to your success is patron
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
