drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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