Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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