Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
