Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
porn star boner night. come get it.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize