gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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