If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
