I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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