Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
