Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics

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(760): View more from California

The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(402): View more from Nebraska

You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.

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(315): View more from New York

someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this

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(541): View more from Oregon

Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.

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(970): View more from Colorado

This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel

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