I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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