Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
