I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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