dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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