I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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