And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
