She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Randomize
