We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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