I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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