He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
