You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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