Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
