i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
