I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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