I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
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it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Your penis caused this!
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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