dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
