So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
