do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
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