Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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