that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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