Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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