I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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