Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
