this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I have post one night stand depression
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
