Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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