ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
