Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize