Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
love makes seman taste better
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
