I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
