BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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