do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
