So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
