Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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