gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
