just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
