I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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