that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
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