He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Houston, we have a squirter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize