Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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