people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
