He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
